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29 July 1947 – 22 November 2005
Remembering Karen Emelie Pasanen Schneider

In memory of a Mother, Stepmother, loving wife and my best friend. You will be missed. This was all planned three years ago and Karen was given another three years. I am extremely happy because Karen is home again. Many times her last few weeks she spoke with her mother and her father. A few weeks ago she said her mother was with many other people that she knew but did not remember. Karen was never afraid of seeing these people and actually spoke to her mother as if in conversation. In her last few days she sad several times ... "I am tired of the pain and being sick, I want to go home..." One day in particular she woke from her sleep and told me can "can we please go home now"? My reply was ... I must stay awhile, but you will be home soon. She smiled and drifted off to sleep.

Three years ago Karen was so very sick and should have died. A funeral was planned. Karen was administered to and was told, "we are all going to die, but some of us are blessed with knowing when we will die. Karen, you know when you will die."

Karen told her brother several weeks ago that she would die in November.

That we have come to this earth as one of our heavenly fathers chosen children. We live life the best of our abilities then because we no longer live in the Garden of Eden we endure many things. We persevere to the end and do the best of our abilities until that time we again return with honor to Jesus feet.

That we strive to do our best with the temporal and celestial knowledge that we have to do our best each and every day. Many people feel that the man of the house or the husband is the lord of the manner. In reality the husband and wife must strive to guide the family through life's tempest to the best of their ability. Yet to add to this struggle the issue that faces some families of having one parent at home and the trials are magnified many times. Under any circumstances to be blessed with the ability to be a mother is the greatest blessing that can be bestowed upon a women.

As a single mother for many years Karen proved she was a fighter and did not let adversity get in her way. She regretted not being able to spend more time with her sons when they were younger and not being able to stay home with them when they were sick.

For the past six years she has been fighting and enduring non stop. She had a goal during the battle. To see one or all of her son's marry and have children. She was so very happy to have her stepdaughter marry and have children. She always loved to hear and she even picture of the grandchildren. Then this summer she finally saw one of her son's wedding. She reached the goal.

As her illness and disease progressed she lost her ability to remember. She was so glad that I had photographs that she could look at to help her remember special occasions and events.

She was a person who never wanted to impose on people; she always wanted what was best for her friends and family. In recent weeks, as two of her son's were leaving after a visit she said, "be sure you have had enough to eat, be sure to take your jacket so do not get cold."

She was very generous person. I heard many times, "I used to have a pair of those skis .... I used to have a tennis racket like that one ...." I would ask, what happened to them? "I thought so-in-so could use them, so I gave it to them ... "

Karen did not want us to be sad over her death, rather asked us to be joyful in our lives. Our lives that were blessed by knowing Karen.

She lived for our accomplishments, our successes.

As we travel through life's trials the best we can leave behind is that we have left our footprints in the sand. All we can ask is to do our best and without regret.

Marriage is not easy under the best of circumstances. We certainly had the tempest of life in our home at times. The trials of different parenting styles; having children from each side of the marriage and Karen having underlying personal health and wellness issues. For this she and I and both will have eternal regret.

Karen recently asked me if she had done well. I reminded her that she raised three sons by herself and that her three sons have turned out well. She tried to do well by her two stepchildren and loved to see her grandchildren.

In addition, she had co-founded a Non-profit charity that is helping hundreds of people in countries all over the world.

She was happy that she was leaving a positive footprint in the sand of time.

She was my wife and my friend and I loved her very much.

As we all at times to search for inner peace and the ability to make sense of various situations in life. I have found some references that I have found of merit.

Brigham Young has said:
What we call "death" is the operation of life.

The concept of death as a change in life, not the end of life.
Paul H. Dunn

Senecca said:
The day which we fear as our last is but the birthday of eternity.

Samuel T. Coleridge said:
Death but supplies the oil for the inextinguishable lamp of everlasting life.

President Brigham Young said:
What we call death is the operation of life ... What we commonly call death does not destroy the body; it only causes a separation of spirit and body.

"This Jesus, who is called Christ, wrought out a perfect atonement for all mankind by His incomparable life, His suffering in Gethsemane, the shedding of His blood, His death upon the cross, and His glorious Resurrection. He conquered the grave, and because of Him, so will we.

( "Jesus, the Very Thought of Thee," Ensign, May 2004, 34 )

God in His infinite mercy has not left grieving loved ones to wonder. He has provided truth. He will inspire an upward reach, and His outstretched arms will embrace you. Jesus promises to one and all who grieve, "I will not leave you comfortless: I will come to you."

The Lord loves us. We are his beloved children.

Our sins are forgiven in Jesus Christ.

There is only one source of true peace. I am certain that the Lord, who notes the fall of a sparrow, looks with compassion upon those who have been called upon to part" even temporarily" from their precious children. The gifts of healing and of peace are desperately needed, and Jesus, through His Atonement, has provided them for one and all.

The Psalmist provided this assurance: "Weeping may endure for a night, but joy cometh in the morning." Said the Lord: "Peace I leave with you, my peace I give unto you: not as the world giveth, give I unto you. Let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid. . Ps. 30: 5

. . In my Father's house are many mansions: if it were not so, I would have told you. I go to prepare a place for you . . . that where I am, there ye may be also." John 14: 2

I express my profound thanks to a loving Heavenly Father who gives to you, to me, and to all who sincerely seek, the knowledge that death is not the end, that His Son even our Savior Jesus Christ died that we might live.

The Master invites one and all: "Come unto me, all ye that labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest." Matt. 11: 28 "Take my yoke upon you, and learn of me; for I am meek and lowly in heart: and ye shall find rest unto your souls." Matt. 11: 29

I have been blessed to know Karen. Karen has embarked on her journey of eternal life where here friends and family have welcomed her home she too will be waiting to welcome us home.

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